Today is March 3, 2009, this marks the day that our baby, Angela, would have been 20 years old. Twenty years ago today, Angela Erin Wait made her way into this world a very round dark haired little girl, babysister for Jennifer, second daughter to Bruce and Terry. Our family was now complete.
As the years past, lives were lived, laughs were had, tears were shed, mistakes were made, but we had fun...in the late 90's Jennifer changed...she had found something different to live for...she found something that her friends had and she wanted...her mom, dad, and sister didn't have a clue...but she did...Jennifer met Jesus in the back of a classroom and she decided she loved Him, and she was going to follow Him for the rest of her life...
Time passed...life went on...mom and dad very messed up...Jennifer prayed...Jennifer got her little sister to pray...Jay started going to youth with her friends...the pastor of the church that housed this youth group sent Jay a note...glad she was a part of the youth...why don't you and your family come to the easter service...
By this time the mom and dad were searching...something was missing...there has to be a way to turn this around...we had love...we had laughter...we had the most amazing daughters in the world...but we had a hole inside...a hole that could only be filled by One...we searched...we found...we cried...we prayed...we forgave...we loved...we cared...we studied...we met Jesus...He tooks us each by the hand...He said, "Come follow Me"...we did...we found what we had been looking for to fill that hole...we were blessed...
Life as we knew it changed...life as we knew it...was ugly...full of baggage...dark...we didn't want that life anymore...so the Pastor and his wife...Matt & Teresa...lead us down a different path...they reached into the swirling black pit of a messed up marriage...helped us to see the Light...nurtured us as we grew in our faith...loved us...and stood by us as we shed the baggage we were carrying...thru much support from the church family we grew...in faith...in love...in spirit...in wisdom...in knowledge...in life...
By the spring of 2004...life could not have been better...looking back...we were on a spiritual high...all of us...mom, dad, Jay and Ang...life was great...the girls were involved in sports, karate, musicals, youth, church camp...mom and dad had found each other again...we lived...we loved...we laughed...and we did all three to the max...focusing our lives on our Heavenly Father had given us a new lease on life...as individuals...as a couple...as parents...as friends...as children...as a family...
May 11, 2004...once again...life as we knew it...ended...but this time was different...this time...this end...wasn't part of our plan...
Jay and Ang were driving to karate at 7:40am...four miles from home they collided with a chemical truck...they were killed instantly...our lives ended too...how do you come back from something like that...where do you go...where do you turn...where do you hide...I could go on and on...but why...it has affected us for the rest of our lives...we have so many words...so many phrases...all in the capacity of encouragement...
They're in a better place...yes, yes they are...and that is supposed to help us how...it happened so fast...and that is supposed to help us how...their purpose here was fulfilled...so...I want them back...don't care that their purpose was fulfilled...they are ours and we want them back...
Please don't misunderstand...they are in a better place...they are the lucky ones...they are not stuck in this place that is getting darker all the time...they are with God...they are in meadows full of flowers...they are with Jesus...and how blessed are we as their parents to know...without a shadow of a doubt...that they are with Jesus...we will see them again...but we are human...we want to see them now...in our timing...not God's timing...our timing...
Ok...so now I am tapped out...wasn't planning on all this mutterings...but for today...there it is...Happy Birthday Angela...if I close my eyes...I can smell your smell...I can feel your bristlie hair on my chin...and I can hear your laughter...love you bunches...bunches of daisies...bunches of hugs & kisses...bunches of giggles...bunches of love...bunches of easter cream eggs...just cause I love'em...ditto to you, Jay...I can feel the softness of your forehead...every time you wanted a hug...your forehead met my lips...if I close my eyes...I can feel God's arms around me...holding me close...I can feel His breath upon my cheek...He is here...His presence sustains us...
"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength" Philippians 4:13 (NIV)
~~time is precious~waste it wisely~~
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